Have you ever set a goal or a resolution, but never really got around to fulfilling it? Well, friend, you’re not alone. The reality is that 47% of American adults break their commitment within the first month, according to a 2021 survey on New Year’s resolutions.
For reasons including demotivation, no solid plan or support, and setting too many or overly ambitious goals, it’s no wonder that only 10% of Americans stick to their resolutions.
So how do you set your goals and crush them? If you’re looking to be a part of the 10% club, find out why you should set goals as well as five rules from ClassPass founder Payal Kadakia on how to do it successfully.
Why Should You Set Goals?
We’re often encouraged to set goals, but why are they important? Mainly because it helps:
- Determine what you want in life. When you’re given the opportunity to contemplate your life goals, it acts as your north star towards the life you truly want to live.
- Give you focus. Without an aim towards an end goal, you may find yourself disjointed and confused. So setting goals for yourself helps to stay on the course towards your destination.
- Measure progress. The road to success can often feel discouraging when you feel like you haven’t ‘arrived’ yet. However, short-term goals help you measure your progression from where you started to where you are now to how far more you’ve got to go to where you want to be.
- Stay motivated. It’s easy to convince yourself, “I’ll get it done tomorrow.” That’s why setting goals — career, financial, love, personal, and what have you — gives you the drive to improve your life.
- Achieve more. Objectives are attainable goals, like stepping stones, towards your long-term goals. When you reach them, it’s a taste of sweet, sweet victory. And that can get you to push yourself to the next objective and then, to the next and so on, achieving way more than what you thought possible.
Now mission or vision statements, goal chart, SMART, vision board, moonshot… whatever your goal setting preferences are, here’s the essential thing to keep in mind: make sure they’re clear, definite, and meaningful to you.
As Payal, who’s also the author of Lifepass: A Groundbreaking Approach to Goal Setting, advises, “At the end of the day, to make anything in your life happen, I really believe you need to prioritize and set specific goals because if not, you can’t execute.”
5 Rules on How to Set Goals for Yourself by Payal Kadakia
It’s true that getting started can be a difficult step. “It’s so easy for us to kind of have a dream in our minds, but it’s really hard to figure out how we get there,” says Payal.
Here are five golden rules Payal gives in her interview on The Mindvalley Podcast so you can set goals and crush them, just like she did.
#1: Find your ‘why’
Easier said than done for some people. But as palliative carer Bronnie Ware highlights in her book, The Top Five Regrets of the Dying, one of the top life lessons from dying clients is:
“I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.”
The truth is, everyone has a ‘why’ — the reason, purpose, or belief that drives and guides us toward fulfillment in all aspects of life.
“Without knowing what that true north is, it’s really even hard to know what we’re fighting for,” explains Payal. She also emphasizes how imperative it is to reflect inward, figure out what you really want to do, lay it down as your goal statement, and then have a plan in place to be able to go after your dreams.
And you can take this as a sign to discover what yours is.
There’s a reason why the saying “it’s never too late to start” exists. And if you’re a bit lost on where to start, a little creative visualization is always a good practice to do. Or try diving in with these three most important questions.
#2: Set boundaries
An integral part of self-care is setting healthy boundaries. Without them, you may feel depleted, taken for granted, taken advantage of, or all of the above.
There will be times when people might not be as supportive as you hope them to be. And there are hundreds of reasons why they choose not to be — maybe it’s due to jealousy, not understanding your passion, or even respecting your ‘why.’ This can lead to resentment, hurt, anger, burnout, and guilt on your end.
“Sometimes, what we need to do when we’re figuring out what our own life and what our own expectations are is cut off these negative thoughts,” says Payal. That includes people in our lives and the internal chatter that aren’t serving us or championing our ‘why.’
So go ahead — set goals and crush them. But remember to also set your boundaries.
#3: Share your goals with your tribe
Setting boundaries and sharing your goals might be a juxtaposition. However, research shows having a support system is beneficial for maintaining your physical and mental health. Some of the benefits include:
- A sense of belonging
- Lower levels of stress
- Improved overall health and wellbeing
- Emotional support
- Improved self-esteem
Even though your goals are unique to you, it does take a village. A tribe can help support, empower, champion, challenge, and send you love showers when you need them the most.
Surround yourself with people who help guide you, not instruct you. This is where an accountability group or a community (like the Mindvalley Tribe) can come in handy.
#4: Make money work for you, instead of working for it
Have you ever skimped out on taking a cab to work, but not felt the pinch when dropping $5,000 on a trip to Europe? It’s because the trip meant more to you than a $5 ride.
Payal explains it’s about the conversations you have with yourself about money. What do you want to spend your money on? And what is money worth to you?
Many people struggle with their money wounds and often feel trapped with their financial obligations. “Sometimes we follow beliefs that don’t serve our happiness, but that feel as if they reflect an accepted and inescapable way of life,” says Vishen, founder of Mindvalley and trainer of the Be Extraordinary Quest.
However, when you truly understand your relationship with money, you’ll understand how to put financial goals in place. And then, you can pursue the things that really matter to you.
#5: Manage your time
“I should work out more…”
“I should eat healthier…”
“I should start a new hobby…”
These are all great plans to have, but oftentimes, they’re met with the same excuse: “I don’t have time.”
Time is one thing we have a limited amount of. So when you start making the time to set goals and crush them, that’s when you’re living your dream.
So while you contemplate what money means to you, remember to include how you want to constructively spend your time while you still have it.
It’s not about the ‘shoulds’ or the obligations set on you by society’s ‘brules.’ It’s about getting crystal clear on what your ‘musts’ are in life. Because your time is your own, prioritize what you must be doing instead of what you should be doing.
Set Your Goals and Crush Them
Life is full of passion, purpose, magic, and miracles, as author and thought leader Roy T. Bennett beautifully puts it. And by setting goals, you’re one step closer to living them.
“Dare to live your precious days on Earth to their fullest, true to yourself, with an open heart and thoughtful mind, and with the courage to change what doesn’t work and accept the consequences,” says Vishen.
So friend, take that bold step toward your dream. You may just find yourself living a life grander, more beautiful, and more fulfilled than you could ever imagine.
Images: @payal / Instagram