Tantra—a term many have heard but few truly understand.
More often than not, people think it’s just about something sexual. However, according to Layla Martin, the founder of the world-renowned VITA™ Method, it’s so much more than that.
“The point in real tantra isn’t to have amazing sex,” she says in her Mindvalley Quest, Neo-Tantra: Discovering Energy Orgasms and Deepening Your Sexual Connection. “The point is to know the truth of your being.”
It’s a path of turning inward, letting go of surface-level perceptions, and getting to what’s real. And in a tantra session, that’s exactly where you start.
What is a tantra session?
A tantra session is a guided experience where you connect with your own energy and emotions (and sometimes with a partner). While people often think they’ll learn about physical intimacy, the sessions are actually more focused on self-awareness and sexual healing.
That’s the true beauty of tantra. It helps you explore what’s happening inside—your thoughts, feelings, and the energy you hold in your body.
As Layla explains, it’s “an extremely diverse spiritual tradition that uses all kinds of methods to achieve enlightenment.” These can include chakra activation, kundalini awakening, mantras, breathing exercises, visualizations, and gentle movements.
The point in real tantra isn’t to have amazing sex. The point is to know the truth of your being.
— Layla Martin, trainer of Mindvalley’s Neo-Tantra: Discovering Energy Orgasms and Deepening Your Sexual Connection Quest
What’s interesting is that these methods used in a tantra class might even affect parts of the brain linked to awareness. Some researchers, like clinical psychiatrist Rick Strassman, believe the brain has the potential to release DMT, a natural chemical thought to spark powerful experiences, often described as “spiritual.”
So during a tantra session, an experienced facilitator or trained coach might guide you through these practices to help you tap into this potential. This can open up new levels of self-awareness, calmness, and connection.
What happens in a tantra session?
Every tantra retreat is a different experience. However, every session of every retreat has one main goal: to explore your thoughts, feelings, and body in a deep, supportive way.
So, what can you expect in a tantra session? Here’s a general breakdown:
- Set a goal or intention for the session to give it meaning.
- Breathwork to help you get centered, grounded, and in tune with your body.
- Meditation and visualization to help quiet your mind and deepen your focus and connection.
- Gentle movement or dancing to help you release tension and get comfortable in your body.
- Energy awareness exercises to sense and move energy in your body and help you feel more in tune with yourself.
- Group sharing or small pods where you connect with a few others in the group, sharing your thoughts and experiences to feel supported.
- Guided relaxation to let you absorb the experience and feel the calmness settle in.
Andreea Tamas, who’s attended multiple tantra retreats, shares that these sessions are a safe space for self-exploration. She herself was encouraged to turn inward, release old emotions, and learn to feel comfortable in her own skin.
“There’s also a lot of education and understanding on how we treat our bodies, what we need as women, and what men need as well,” she tells Mindvalley Pulse.
When it comes down to it, experiencing a real tantra retreat isn’t about changing yourself but finally meeting the parts of you that have been waiting to be seen.
Benefits of experiencing a tantra session
Tantra can offer a range of unique benefits, touching everything from your confidence to your inner peace. For Layla, this tradition is “one of the highest, most developed, most incredible paths to spiritual awakening.”
And it’s not just personal experiences that show this—research backs it up too. A study published in The Journal of Sexual Medicine shows that tantra can help reduce anxiety, support emotional healing, and promote a sense of wholeness that most people are looking for.
Layla also highlights even more ways that tantra can change your life in her Mindvalley Quest:
- Deeper intimacy and connection with partners
- Healing deep wounds and overcoming trauma related to sexuality
- Awakening personal power and confidence
- Full-body orgasms
- Greater awareness and connection to emotions and inner energy
- More presence
- Improved communication of your needs
- Enhanced health and longevity
- Lasting habits for sexual wellness
Layla herself has experienced these benefits firsthand. “I not only healed very deep wounds and fears around my sexuality and began having this super incredible sex,” she says, “but I woke up to my full personal power.”
For Andreea, the journey to awakening her inner sex goddess was just as powerful. She felt a new level of self-acceptance and healing, especially in connecting with other women in such a sacred space.
Now, imagine yourself basking in that same glow… with deeper love, peace, and the knowing of who you truly are. That’s the promise of tantra.
How to find a good tantra session
Choosing a tantra session starts with knowing what you’re looking for. So ask yourself: Do you want to go about this solo? Or would you like to share it with a partner?
For Erick Rivera Martin, an executive coach and the Regional Partnerships Director at Mindvalley, it was the latter. He and his wife attended a retreat together to “work on our childhood and teenage traumas, achieve greater intimacy between us, and connect spiritually.”
Once you’ve got that down, look for an experience that feels right for you. For instance, Andreea’s first two retreats were women-only. The transformation she went through there granted her the confidence to attend a mixed one afterward.
Remember that there’s a lot of depth to this work. That’s why, according to Andreea, it’s incredibly important to “do your research, ask for referrals, and trust your intuition.”
Here are her tips on each:
- Do your research. Check how long the teacher has been teaching, and look for reviews. If you come across mixed feedback, consider what matters most to you and whether the session aligns with what you’re looking for.
- Seek recommendations. Ask friends or reach out within your community. Hearing firsthand experiences can give you valuable insights into which teachers foster a safe, respectful environment (and which ones don’t).
- Listen to your intuition. If something feels off, trust it. Your gut can often guide you toward a teacher or group that matches your energy and comfort level.
Ultimately, finding the right tantra session can set the stage for profound healing. And by the end, you might just find that the real journey to your sacred sexuality begins.
Frequently asked questions
What should I wear to a tantra session?
Comfort is key here. You want to feel relaxed and at ease—Andreea suggests opting for clothing that allows you to move freely and express yourself.
Many people choose loose-fitting, breathable clothes that make it easier to engage in movement or gentle exercises. Think along the lines of palazzo pants, soft tank tops, comfortable shorts, or flowy shirts.
If the session involves some form of physical touch or partner work, you might want to consider wearing something that makes you feel confident and comfortable in your own skin.
Some sessions may also invite you to dress in a way that aligns with the theme of the experience. For example, if it’s a women-only retreat, there might be a request to wear something that honors your feminine energy.
The bottom line is, wear what feels good to you.
Do I need a partner for a tantra session?
No, you don’t necessarily need a partner to attend a tantra session. There are plenty of people out there who start their tantra journey on their own to explore their individual energy and emotions.
As Andreea points out, these sessions are all about discovering yourself. She noticed that being in a women-only retreat helped her dive deep into her feelings and experiences without having to worry about a partner being there.
That said, if you and your partner are open to attending a tantra session together, it can be a great way to strengthen your bond and work through any issues you may face as a couple.
For Erick and his wife, tantra helped foster “greater intimacy and heightened awareness of our love, desire, and spirituality as a couple.” This kind of shared experience can lead to meaningful growth for both of you as well.
Is tantra safe?
The short answer is yes. However, it really depends on how you approach it.
Here are a few things you can keep in mind to have a safe and open experience:
- Pick a space that feels supportive and respectful. It helps set the vibe for your journey and allows you to immerse completely without judgment.
- Work with experienced guides who know what they’re doing. Look for those who prioritize consent and understand personal boundaries.
- Be aware of the energy. Tantra practices can unleash pent-up energy, which is why it’s crucial to approach them thoughtfully. For instance, kundalini awakening can stir up strong emotions. If you’re not prepared or don’t have proper guidance, it might feel overwhelming or chaotic.
- Discuss boundaries and comfort levels. Some practices, like tantric yoga and tantra massage, involve touch and going into someone’s personal space. So, it’s essential to communicate what feels comfortable for you and go at your own pace.
- Have a post-session reflection. This can help you sort through any feelings that came up and really lock in the lessons you learned.
Taking part in a tantra session is about growth, as Layla emphasizes throughout her Quest. It’s an opportunity to confront old patterns, open up to new experiences, and evolve in ways you might not expect.
Love deeper, connect stronger
“So many of us have been taught to fear our own sexuality and sexual power,” says Layla. It’s a fear that holds you back, creating feelings of shame or a disconnect from your desires.
However, when you learn to unlock that power, Layla adds, you have the ability to “become magnetic, radiant, and more able to create lasting love and passion in relationships.”
Now, if you’re looking to take that leap into self-discovery, signing up for a free Mindvalley account is a great first step. You’ll gain access to the first few lessons of two amazing quests:
- Neo-Tantra: Discovering Energy Orgasms and Deepening Your Sexual Connection with Layla Martin, where you can discover how to tap into your sexual energy for deeper intimacy.
- Tantra Touch with the late Psalm Isadora, where you can learn to reconnect with your sacred sensuality and reignite your passion.
As you take this leap, remember this: the path to true intimacy is paved with the courage to embrace who you really are. Own your journey and watch the magic unfold.
Welcome in.
