Self-introspection: How to build deep self-understanding

How well do you know yourself? Not your favorite color or whether you’re a cat or dog person. But about the deep, nitty-gritty stuff—the dreams you’ve tucked away, the fears that keep you up at night, the personal strengths that make you, well, you.

This is the essence of self-introspection. It’s a powerful tool for personal growth and understanding.

As Marisa Peer, a renowned hypnotherapist and the trainer of Mindvalley’s Uncompromised Life Quest, explains, the relationship you build with yourself is never going to bore you or disappoint you. And the best part of it all is that it lasts forever.

What is self-introspection?

At its core, self-introspection is like being your own Sherlock Holmes. It’s a psychological process where you turn your investigative gaze inward, analyzing your thoughts, feelings, and motivations. It’s a journey into the recesses of your mind, where the searchlight of your attention illuminates your deepest desires, fears, and beliefs.

But where did this soul-searching practice originate? 

Well, it has roots in both Eastern and Western philosophies, tracing back to ancient practices like meditation, mindfulness, and philosophical introspection. It’s as old as human curiosity about the self—so, pretty ancient.

What are the benefits of self-introspection?

Self-introspection is like a magic pill that has the potential to transform your inner world. Here are a few reasons why:

• Increases self-awareness. Looking inward illuminates your inner landscape, your motivations, your fears, and your dreams. And in fact, research has shown that self-awareness has the potential to positively influence impulsive and counterproductive behavior.
• Boosts decision-making. Self-introspection is like your personal compass, helping you navigate through the choices of life. By understanding your values, your priorities, and how you react in certain situations, you can make decisions that align with your true self.
• Jazzes up your relationships. Understanding yourself can have a massive impact on your relationships. Studies show that moving your attention inward can change your perspectives on a relationship, therefore remodeling the interaction itself, be it romantic or platonic.
• Kickstarts your personal growth. Self-introspection is like having a personal trainer for your mind, helping you identify areas for improvement and celebrate your strengths. It’s an investment in yourself—think of it as a gym membership for your soul.

Think of it as the cheapest form of self-therapy you may ever find. And it might be more enlightening than you’d expect.

Examples of self-introspection

The world is full of great examples of the power of introspection. And if you can’t think of any close next-door neighbors who emerged stronger and wiser from the realms of their inner world, then here are some pop-culture depictions:

• Think Elizabeth Gilbert in Eat, Pray, Love. She found solace in her self-introspection, traveling the world and reconnecting with her truest desires, but also her deep-buried darkness. You may not need to go all the way to India, Italy, or Indonesia to find your most authentic self, but the mere act of going inward can unravel your infinite potential.
• Remember Christopher Nolan’s Inception movie? Throughout the movie, Dom Cobb is tormented by his past, which frequently interrupts his missions in the form of his deceased wife, Mal. As he faces his guilt and regret head-on, he goes through an intense period of self-introspection. This self-introspection eventually leads to his acceptance and liberation from Mal’s haunting memory.
• In Good Will Hunting, Dr. Sean Maguire is a therapist who helps Will Hunting, a janitor at MIT with a genius-level intellect but struggles with past trauma and a fear of abandonment. In their sessions, Sean encourages Will to introspect, helping him confront his past, understand his feelings, and eventually face his fear of intimacy and embrace his potential.

Of course, life won’t always look like a cinematic Hollywood film plot. However, having a better understanding of yourself has never hurt anyone, and you might even be taken aback by the depths of your inner world.

Self-introspection vs. self-reflection

Let’s take self-introspection vs. self-reflection. Sounds like a head-to-head philosophical match, doesn’t it?

Self-introspection is like having a heart-to-heart with your soul. You’re diving deeper, asking questions like, “Why do I feel this way?” or “What does this reaction tell me about myself?” 

On the other hand, self-reflection is like looking into a mirror, observing your actions, reactions, and behaviors. You’re scrutinizing your own personal rerun, trying to understand why you binge-ate those cookies or why you snapped at your partner.

You could say that self-introspection is more like your inner Freud, delving into the why and the motivations beneath. On the other hand, self-reflection is the Sherlock Holmes of the mind, observing the facts, the what, and the how.

Here’s a side-by-side comparison between the two:

So, in the grand scheme of self-improvement, who’s the winner of this head-to-head? Well, it’s not so much a competition as it is a tag team match. 

Both self-introspection and self-reflection have their roles in helping us understand ourselves better.

How to do self-introspection: Tips from Mindvalley experts

It’s essential to understand the meaning of self-introspection at the beginning of your journey. And moving forward, a few practical tips from Mindvalley experts might help you along the way:

1. Dive deep into your shadow work | Ken Wilber

The shadow side consists of all the hidden parts of your conscious mind. All that has been split off from who you think you are—your shame, fears, and wounds—but also your divine spirit, blinding beauty, and hidden talents.

It’s not necessarily only about the darkest parts of your psyche, but also about those yet to be illuminated. 

Ken Wilber, a renowned leader in psychology, philosophy, and religion who’s also the trainer of Mindvalley’s Integral Life Quest, created a 3-2-1 process to get to know your shadow side:

• Locate the shadow—third person: see what you judge in others, what triggers you, and what you reject.
• Talk to it—second person: start having a dialogue with the shadow part that you identified. You can ask why it comes into your life, what it wants to show you, or what it needs from you.
• Be it—first person: just for this exercise, embody the shadow aspect that you discovered. Imagine for a few moments how it feels in your body, what it says, and when it wants to show up.

When you’re ready to explore even further, you can start working with self-introspection questions: 75 shadow work prompts for healing and growth

2. Embrace your emotional experiences | Jon Butcher

“Emotions are body wisdom,” explains Jon Butcher, founder of Lifebook and trainer of Mindvalley’s Lifebook Online Quest. “They are innate intelligence, signals from deep within us that come up in response to some aspect of reality that we may not even be conscious of.”

When you let go of the resistance to feeling your emotions, you may find that your greatness arises from within. The types of emotions and feelings you experience in your life can lead you to uncover your best self. 

And when you truly realize the importance of nurturing your high-frequency emotional states, running away from your deepest emotional experiences won’t seem like an option anymore.

Learn more: Beyond happy and sad: The power of understanding all types of emotions

3. Remember the 9 rules of the mind | Marisa Peer

When embarking on the journey of self-introspection, take into consideration the nine rules your mind is operating on. Marisa Peer, renowned hypnotherapist and trainer of Mindvalley’s Uncompromised Life Quest, highlights them to have a better understanding of how your inner world is constructed:

1. What is expected tends to be realized.
2. Imagination is more powerful than knowledge.
3. Imagination is more powerful than logic.
4. Your mind always does what it thinks you want it to do.
5. It works to move you from pain to pleasure.
6. It responds to the pictures in your head and the words you say to yourself.
7. The mind learns by repetition.
8. It loves what is familiar.
9. We make our beliefs and our beliefs make us.

Let them sink in and see how you can use them to activate the mind’s maximum potential.

4. Answer the 3 most important questions | Vishen

Oftentimes, only going within and connecting deeper with what you truly want will unlock your potential. And as Vishen, the founder of Mindvalley, explains, “End goals are the result of being a human. They are about experiencing love, being truly happy, and contributing to the world.”

So, once you start looking inward, a practice that helps to alchemize the findings of your epiphanies will only propel you forward to the next level of personal growth.

Here are the three most important questions that you can ask yourself during your self-introspection moments:

• What do you want to experience in life?
• How do you want to grow and develop yourself?
• How do you want to contribute to the world?

Learn more: 3 Most Important Questions

5. Focus on the mind-brain-body connection | Dr. Caroline Leaf

The mind is like a steering wheel, guiding your brain and body in the direction you want to go, according to Dr. Caroline Leaf, cognitive neuroscientist and trainer of Mindvalley’s Calm Mind: A Scientific Method for Managing Anxiety and Depression Quest. 

So when your introspection reveals thought patterns and the root issues of your life problems, you should know how to approach them holistically.

Whatever happens at one level of your mind will then register in your body and brain. This is why learning mind management tools is key to treating anxiety and depression. 

Dr. Leaf highlights that your mind is what drives your body’s “aliveness,” therefore it’s the mechanism behind any real changes in the brain.

Learn more: Regain your inner peace: 20 mindfulness practices for anxiety

Know thyself

As Socrates once said, true knowledge begins with self-discovery. Therefore, there’s nothing more precious you could do than get to know yourself better.

And the truth is, it’s not an easy ride to the hidden dimensions of your being. However, with a little bit of guidance along the way, you may actually start to enjoy the journey.

You can uncover the deepest truths about yourself and unleash your infinite potential with Mindvalley’s transformational quests, such as:

• Integral Life with Ken Wilber
• Lifebook Online with Jon and Missy Butcher
• Uncompromised Life with Marisa Peer
• The 3 Most Important Questions with Vishen
• Calm Mind: A Scientific Method for Managing Anxiety and Depression with Dr. Caroline Leaf

You could claim your free access today and sample classes from these programs and many others (except the Lifebook Online Quest, which you can get a taste of through this free masterclass). 

And the best part of it all is that you don’t have to be alone on the journey of actualizing your potential. You can join a community of like-minded people who are as ready to open themselves to introspection as you are.

Welcome in.