Once upon a time, people stopped believing in all the happily-ever-after fairy tales. Love disappointed them again and again, so they just gave up their innocent hope of effortlessly meeting their soulmate. The idea of how to find love ceased to bother their minds and hearts.
One of the basic human needs is love and connection. Given this fact, there’s no surprise that most of us are running after it. We still secretly wish that somehow, someday, we’ll meet the one and everything will fall right into place.
The question is, is it possible?
According to these people, it absolutely is.
Check out these relationship tips, backed up by three successful stories from Katherine Woodward Thomas’ bestselling program, Calling in the One.
1. Begin With Your Future
Studies have shown how our young relational interactions will create patterns that repeat themselves in adulthood.
We grow up creating a certain relationship pattern based on the way we interacted with our primary caregivers. When our needs as children aren’t properly met, we develop unhealthy ways to relate with others. These patterns will ‘lead’ the way throughout our love life later on.
Take, for example, a child whose mom was distant throughout their childhood when they needed affection. They will grow up and become hesitant to receive love from a partner because their inner child has never been used to this.
Identifying your patterns is indeed helpful to understand how you attract the people you end up falling in love with. However, just understanding on a mental level isn’t changing much, is it?
That’s why, relationship expert and trainer of Mindvalley’s Calling in The One Quest, Katherine Woodward Thomas recommends always beginning with your future.
If you’re wondering how to find love, wonder no more. Focusing on the future you’re aspiring to create is the first step to take. If you’re directing your energy into what happened in the past and how terribly hurt you’ve been, you will just make the pain grow.
So you can now give your gentle heart a well-deserved break and imagine the most wonderful future you’re yearning for because it’s possible. Set an intention for the relationship you most desire to create. And let the magic happen.
Stick your foot in the door of possibility, no matter what your past is.
— Katherine Woodward Thomas, relationship expert and trainer of Mindvalley’s Calling in The One Quest
Prem’s story:
“Finding Calling in The One work was truly a miracle for me. It helped me understand and release the patterns of the past that separated me from my heart’s desire, and it gave me the tools I needed to manifest great love in my life.
Katherine Woodward Thomas helped me believe in the possibility of healthy and happy love. Today I am happily married to my beloved, Bob, being loved beyond my wildest dreams and having the time of my life!”
— Prem Glidden, Ullman certified life and relationship coach from Florida, United States
Get inspired:
- How to Improve Your Love Relationships: Podcast with Katherine Woodward Thomas
2. Make Space For Your Beloved
How to find the one you may ask. The answer is simply making some space for him/her to come.
Do you agree with me that you can’t sit down and stand up at the same time? If the answer is yes, then you know you can’t have the love you wish for if you haven’t let go of the love you don’t want (and everything related to it).
What does letting go look like?
- Release the patterns keeping you stuck.
- Change the core beliefs limiting your love experiences.
- Be honest with yourself about wanting to let go of the relationship you’re currently involved in.
The things above might be difficult to process and you should take your time. But when you’re ready, take a deep breath, connect to your heart, and ask yourself:
- Is my current relationship aligned with my vision for the future?
- What am I searching for in a partner?
- What are my current beliefs on love?
- Which beliefs do I want to have?
- What am I most afraid of changing or letting go of? Why?
There are no right or wrong answers, so let them flow naturally. Simply being vulnerable and honest will bring you some clarity on how to find love again.
Evelyn’s story:
“The first day after the program, I had clarity knowing that I must decide on letting this relationship go. I started taking action that day towards releasing this bondage that has been holding me back because I cannot have what I want until I let go of what I do not want.
I’ve learned that I AM ENOUGH and I AM WORTHY of the love of my life where I feel safe and I can give and receive unconditional love and feel comfortable in being my authentic self.”
— Evelyn, licensed real estate agent from Florida, United States
Get inspired:
3. See Who the Future You Is a.k.a Self-Love
We all secretly love clichés, don’t we? So if you go on the search of how to find love, you can let your journey be inspired by this: you’ll discover how to find the love of your life, when you realize you are the love of your life.
Remember the ideal future you imagined earlier? Katherine suggests asking ourselves who we are in that future. Imagine this joyful future you and take into consideration your:
- Qualities
- Values
- Routines
- Beliefs
- Boundaries
The most impressive act of self-love is starting to build that future version of yourself, right now. Slowly, but surely.
According to Katherine, we should also make sure our idea of self-love doesn’t mean we become so self-sufficient that we don’t need people to connect to anymore.
We confused needing people with being needy.
— Katherine Woodward Thomas, relationship expert and trainer of Mindvalley’s Calling in The One Quest
As your brain is hardwired for connection, your impulse to find love is completely natural. Don’t fight against it. Longing for intimacy only enhances the humane beauty of your heart.
April’s story:
“Now, I am standing in love with myself, wanting more for myself than what I wanted in the past. Because I now believe I can have more than what I was allowing myself before. And I am believing in what’s possible for me, and holding to stay open and to be in receiving energy, to see someone for who they are and not who I want them to be.
I believe I can create and have the connected, committed, and loving partnership that I want with someone else. I’m reminded that I get to become who I need to be for myself, to live fulfilled, and by doing so, I also become the right partner for someone else and receive the right partner for me. I am ready.”
— April Yee, life coach from San Francisco, United States
Get inspired:
Calling In True Love
It’s no secret anymore that we become well in the company of others and we can start shifting our perspective on how to find love and what it means for us.
Love makes us who we are. Love determines who we can become. A relationship can turn into a springboard for you to actualize your potential.
— Katherine Woodward Thomas, relationship expert and trainer of Mindvalley’s Calling in The One Quest
If you’re ready to call in the one, head over to Mindvalley and discover how to step into your greatness to manifest the love life you’ve always dreamed of. Welcome in.