Why You Never Need to Go Look for Love

3 minutes read -
Madilyn Smith
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Table of Contents
Summary: Most of us can agree that the dating game can be a pretty frustrating. What can you do about it though? Instead of searching, do this instead.
Contents

Whether you’re single, in a long-term relationship, or somewhere in between, most of us can agree that the dating game can be a pretty frustrating place.

The transitionary period between being joyfully single or in a happy relationship can often feel pretty lonely and uncertain. 

But too often we spend our time daydreaming about the person we’d love to be with instead of focusing our energy on who we want to be.

love couple

The Truth About Timing

We’ve all heard that timing is everything, but what does that mean exactly?

How do we know when it’s the right time? 

If you’re healing from a bad breakup or simply haven’t found the ‘right one yet, it’s completely normal to wonder (A) where they are and (B) why the hell is it taking them so long?

We scavenge through dating apps, and introduce ourselves over dinner time and time again only to find mismatches galore, it can almost feel a little unfair.

We’re putting ourselves out there and investing all our efforts into meeting that special someone, but they just won’t show up.

But the truth is, the greatest relationships in our lives don’t appear when we’re looking for them. They arise when we’re READY for them.

While we may feel ready to date again when we go into it with a clear-set intention and purpose in mind, is truly ready for love goes far deeper than that.

online dating app

Be Who You Want to Be With

The funny thing about personal growth is that when you dive deep within yourself and work to evolve every single day, then what you want NOW and who you are NOW will soon be completely irrelevant.

This is to say that the person you’re deeply infatuated with today may very well be perfect for you RIGHT NOW.

But what about who you want to be two years from now or 10 years from now or 20 years from now?

Before planning the dream wedding ask yourself, is the soulmate (or the twin flame) of your dreams today really aligned with who you’re working to become?

Are they someone you can learn from, grow with, and transcend the limits of who you are right now? 

And if you’re completely single, is this the kind of person you’re willing to wait for?

just married

Instead of Searching…Do This Instead

Now, waiting doesn’t mean staring out the window all day, daydreaming of being swept off of your feet.

Allowing the time and space for the right person to come into your life isn’t about watching the clock count down.

It’s about surrendering to the process of who you’re meant to be with while becoming who you’re meant to be. 

All the tough times where you’ve come out on the other side, all the moments where you’ve pushed your limits, and all the deep introspection about who you really are and what you really want…

Now THAT is the recipe for love.

Because real love doesn’t come when you’re looking for it. It comes when you’re ready for it.

And once we know without a shadow of a doubt who you are, what you want, and what you’re working to become…

Love will come into your life without a second thought.

Watch the First Lesson of the Quest

Calling in "The One" with Relationships Coach Katherine Woodward Thomas

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Madilyn Smith

Madilyn Smith

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