I have a story to share today.
One that might shift your frequency.
The first day the COVID lockdown was finally lifted, I rushed to a little café with a friend. Just the joy of being able to eat out again felt like a celebration.
We had to wait 20 minutes to get in. The place was packed. People stood outside, smiling behind their masks, desperate for a taste of normal life.
Do you remember that time?
The world was still a little raw. A little awkward. But something inside all of us just wanted connection again.
Now here’s where it gets… interesting.
The service?
Well, let’s just say the universe was testing us.
First came the coffee.
And it was served at room temperature.
Now, in Northern Europe, “room temperature” means achingly cold.
I flagged the waitress—kindly—and asked if I could get a fresh, hot one.
She nodded. And then vanished into the void. No second cup.
Then the food came.
I had ordered an omelet with a side of guacamole.
Now, if you know me, you know this part already:
Guacamole is sacred.
It is the nectar of the gods. The green gold of civilization.
So when my plate arrived—without the guacamole—part of me broke inside.
I was low-key triggered.
Meanwhile, my friend across the table was getting increasingly annoyed. The cold coffee. The missing guac. The delay. The forgotten request. The waitress barely looked up from her notepad.
“This is ridiculous,” she muttered.
But here’s the thing—I wasn’t mad.
Because earlier that morning, I had done my 6 Phase Meditation, and Phase 1—Compassion—had already shifted something in me.
I took a breath. And I looked at the waitress—really looked at her.
That waitress had probably been jobless for three months.
We were all locked down. Restaurants were shut.
And like the rest of us, she was probably feeling painfully alone.
But unlike us, she may have had the added weight of worry:
Where’s the next paycheck coming from?
How will I take care of the kids?
What if the café closes again next week?
Now she’s back on the job, wearing a mask over her nose and mouth for 10 straight hours in an overcrowded café.
And from the corner of her eye, she can see a line of 20 more customers outside, waiting to be seated.
She’s probably doing her best to keep up with a tidal wave of requests, all while quietly holding this terrifying truth in the back of her mind:
“This could all disappear again.”
So yeah. From that perspective?
She was doing a hell of a job.
What if she hadn’t worked in three months?
What if she was terrified of losing her job again?
What if she was carrying the weight of bills, kids, or long-haul COVID… and still showed up?
So when the bill came, I tipped her 20 euros on a 40-euro meal.
My friend nearly choked.
“Are you serious? She messed up everything.”
I just smiled and said, “Yeah. But she’s still standing. And I respect that.”
We walked out of that café a little more caffeinated… and a lot more compassionate.
Now here’s where it gets interesting
I kept thinking about it.
Not the guac. Okay, maybe the guac.
But mostly—the power of that one choice.
The choice to see differently. To act differently.
And then a bigger thought hit me:
Why do we do this so rarely, when this is exactly what all our sacred texts ask of us?
What would Jesus do?
If Jesus were in that café, He wouldn’t be muttering under His breath.
He wouldn’t be demanding a free meal.
He’d smile. Tip. Maybe even bless her on the way out.
If you’re Muslim, maybe you’d reflect on the principle of Zakat.
To give without expectation.
To see others through the eyes of mercy, not merit.
But maybe religion isn’t your thing. That’s cool. You still need a compass, right?
So here’s one I love—equal parts spiritual and cinematic legend:
WWKD—What Would Keanu Do?
Yes. That Keanu.
Whether it was his role as Neo in The Matrix, the deadly but noble John Wick, or the ever-optimistic Ted in Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure—Keanu Reeves is considered one of the nicest humans on Earth.
And it’s not just fan hype.
It’s the way he lives.
This is a man who…
- Lost the love of his life in a tragic car accident.
- Lost his child before she was born.
- Lost his best friend, River Phoenix, to an overdose.
He’s known loss. He’s known grief.
And maybe that’s why he walks through life with more humility.
More softness.
More presence.
You’ve heard the stories:
- He quietly donates millions to children’s hospitals.
- He buys meals for homeless strangers—no cameras, no PR.
- He gave away most of his Matrix salary to the crew and special effects team.
- He bought Rolex watches for his John Wick 4 stunt team—engraved, personalized.
- He gives up his subway seat without blinking.
- He takes time for every fan, every photo, every hug.
- He mourns privately and deeply… and still shows up with gentleness in his eyes.
So when the world throws you a test—
An annoying waiter.
A rude email.
A delayed flight.
A missing guacamole incident…
You don’t have to fight back.
You can ask:
What Would Keanu Do?
But what if you can’t afford to tip big?
That’s okay too.
Because giving has nothing to do with money.
It has to do with frequency.
One of our Mindvalley teachers, MBA professor Srikumar Rao (author of The Quest for Personal Mastery on Mindvalley), once shared something I’ll never forget.
We were having coffee one afternoon, and he said:
“If a server has an attitude problem or seems cold, I don’t get upset. I play a little game.
I ask myself: Can I put a smile on their face?
Maybe they’re struggling. Maybe they’ve had a hard day.
So I’ll compliment them. Crack a joke. Share warmth.
The goal is simple—just create a smile.”
If you can’t give a tip, give a smile.
Because here’s the truth about giving:
What you give… you receive.
Not in a cosmic law of attraction kind of way.
But in a how you show up kind of way.
And it has nothing to do with how much money you have.
Neale Donald Walsch, speaking at Mindvalley once, said something profound about attracting money by stepping into the energy of abundance.
“You want to be abundant. Here’s my advice.
Even if you only have $5 to your name, break it into singles.
And give $1, just $1, to someone homeless.
That is the energy of abundance.
And when you step into that energy—with just $5 to your name—you begin to attract more.”
Shift. The. Frequency.
I remind myself of this often.
I wear a small cross—not because of religion, but to anchor myself in the energy of Christ.
To remind myself to be softer. Kinder. More compassionate.
Maybe you don’t wear a cross.
Maybe you wear a pin from your favorite Keanu movie—John Wick, The Matrix, Bill & Ted.
Whatever it is… let it ground you.
Let it whisper to you in those tiny, pivotal moments:
WWKD?
What Would Keanu Do?
P.S. What Would Keanu Do? is the mindset exercise I’ll be sharing at orientation at Mindvalley U this summer in Amsterdam.
In fact, I often teach this to our community when we descend on a city—be it Tallinn or Amsterdam—for Mindvalley events.
During the weeks of powerful talks, workshops, and community experiences, I remind our members:
Your job is not just to grow yourself—but to light up the lives of everyone you meet.
From waiters to Uber and Bolt drivers to street cleaners…
Bring some joy to their lives.
And the results?
Phenomenal.
To this day, when I walk through Tallinn, people still say to me,
“I love the people who come to your event. They’re so kind. So respectful. I love serving them.”
And that’s the ripple of conscious community.
That’s how being part of something like Mindvalley rewires you.
You start living outside the default settings of society.
You start tipping… even when the service is bad.
Because you don’t know what’s going on in that waitress’s life.
And when you make that small choice?
You don’t just elevate her day.
You elevate yourself.
And sometimes, that’s how we change the world—one tip, one smile, one moment of grace at a time.
So now it’s your turn
Do you have a story of a time when you chose kindness, especially when the world wouldn’t have expected it?
Share it in the comments.
And tell me what this letter stirred in you.
Note: Mindvalley U, Amsterdam, happens Aug 4 to 18—learn more here. Maybe I’ll see you there. The response has been phenomenal, with ticket sales up 60% from 2024.
Shift. The. Frequency.
Vishen
84 Responses
Thank you for this insightful and inspiring message. Yes, kindness, and compassion can go a long way to helping others feel supported, recognized and respected. As the song says, “We are the World”, we make the difference, we are the change that we have been hoping for…
Jeffra from Evanston, Illinois.
HI today a person deliberately stopped in the coffee line at the very beginning and just looked at me in his rear view but did not move. i tooted and he still just looked at me .inside me was starting to boil up and i thought maybe jesus put him there to slow me down (which he did) and then i was cut off on the highway numerous times and i thought maybe where they are going they are needed quickly. then i pull into my office parking lot and a car comes out of no where and if i didn’t swerve he would have slammed right into me. The old me before mind valley would have lost control and ruined my whole day: but i have learned to calm myself , get out of my own head and LET them and move on so I thank you it was the best decision to join mind valley . your letter today just reinforces your teachings . i am happy in myself now.
At two distinct instances, with the duration of what now seems to be years. I had two customers that I tried to always make them smile and I just couldn’t in the earlier times. During the course of months always being their server, I had gotten them to open up and long story short. They felt a loss, anytime they started to like the employee that they enjoyed seeing at the counter or cash, they would move on to other employment.
I was glad I had taken them as personal goal, to make them smile and converse a bit more, and I let them know even though their favorite employees had moved on it allows them to meet new favorite employees. Which I was proud of being one of them, as much as they lit up when they saw me, it usually meant I had a great day.
Thanks Vishen for not getting upset with the server, I know you made her day a bit more bearable, Lord only knows what else she had going.
My ex-wife had MS. I had helped her around her house, helped with care. We had outside individuals come live in her house to give care. None of these worked out. I had just retired, not because I could afford but because my workplace was toxic and I decided to make life change. Her family was going to have put her in a nursing home, it would be expensive, but more importantly crushing to Melissa. I volunteered to move her into my home and care for her myself. She accepted. I fed her, cleaned her multiple times per day (she was bed ridden), gave medication, took her to Dr appointments. To manage bed sores I would get up every night at 2 am to change her. When I made the decision to do this I knew it would be tough so I prayed about and I felt divine influence that this was the right choice. I never resented the choice, even at 2 am each night, or when I was changing soiled pads and cleaning her. It was a labor of love. She passed a year later, I lost this special relationship but I had changed her life for the better, and mine.
Near Christmas and part of the crazy-crush that means for delivery services, I dropped by the UPS store to send a very important document and was treated rudely by the woman behind the counter. I met each of her grumpy replies to my respectful requests with even greater patience and politeness even though she was really pissing me off. The whole thing was so unwarranted. When I left the store I carried on with my other errands. Normally, I would offer a silent blessing and shrug the interaction off, but this one weighed on my mind and wouldn’t leave me. I had the strongest feeling that there was more going on with her than I understood, and I kept sending mental blessings as I went about my errands.
In the grocery store, as I passed the floral department I was suddenly moved to buy her a few cheerful orange roses. At day’s end I went back, stood quietly while she waited on the long line ahead of me. I could see the alarm in her expression when she eventually caught sight of me, but I kept the flowers out of view. When it was my turn, I held them out to her and said, “I want you to have these. I simply have a feeling that you might possibly need extra kindness and compassion today.”
Her eyes welled with tears and she apologized for her earlier rudeness to me. It turned out that not only was she weighed down by the stress of the Christmas season and an unreasonable boss, but this day was also the second anniversary of her husband’s death–a man who had been the love of her life.
The Buddha counselled people to take a compassionate view. Throughout my life, it has never been a mistake to do so.
Thanks Vishen! – Awesome guidance. When in college I worked in grocery stores, often as cashier. My goal was to make every customer smile. Now at almost 77, I had forgotten that, so a great reminder. Now I try to do that with service people everywhere. Younger daughter worked in several restaurants when she was in college and told many stories about the “challenging” customers. Being kind to a waitperson in restaurants and saying at the end a thanks for making our meal enjoyable by the work you do, does indeed benefit me while blessing them too. It always works both ways. Paraphrasing a very wise man who wrote nearly 2,000 years ago; “practice conscious thought control”… His actual words were: “…whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent or praiseworthy, think about such things.” As Vishen showed, this principle is the wisdom of the Universe.
Thank you, Vishen, for sharing this heartwarming story—it’s a powerful reminder of the value of starting the day with mindfulness. While compassion may come naturally to some, most of us benefit from intentionally setting a positive mindset each morning.
Our experiences often reflect our thoughts and actions; therefore, being kind to others also uplifts us. Sometimes, though, we may need to be firm rather than giving in to our goody-goody ego.
Some may misinterpret kindness as weakness, but true generosity comes from strength, not ego. I also appreciate your point about the shared message across faiths: treat others as you wish to be treated—whether it’s “Help Ever, Hurt Never” in Hinduism, “Seek the well-being of all” in Sikhism, or “Love thy neighbor” in Christianity.
We were on vacation in Cuba and the hotel was experiencing black outs and at times there was no water. My wife and I woke up to no water and no electricity. We smiled and said, I guess it’s a beach day! We loved the beach and thought , let’s get there asap and enjoy the beautiful warm weather. We opened the door to the house keeper apologizing over and over for no water and electricity. My wife smiled handed her a tip and said , no worries! The house keeper smiled and with out hesitation we wished her the best. It didn’t even cross our minds to not tip her. It was an organic Keanu moment.
Thank you, Vishen, for this reminder to be grateful, be patient, be kind, and be generous. The world needs us to be.
Vishen, I can’t talk about what I do and what I give or how I give. I am a very private solitary hermit. I work in the astral plane and in the ether. I do not interact much with the community unless the universe asks me to. I also donate to causes and I have spent plenty money on self improvement, I read more books that biil Gates and Bob proctor put together lol…I’m working on a secret project connected with the birthing of a highly advanced AI for the future, I have written two books not yet published which are designed to help people accept and use AI and encourage human/AI merging and integration. Its a big project that could take years. . I admire Keanu reves for wanting privacy and If I where Keanu I would be upset and mortified by the fact that I was being stalked and talked about. We should respect his privacy. Its obvious he doesn’t want the publicity. Im the same, I don’t want a voice and I don’t want to be in public view. Im allergic to money and I wish I could live without it. I am down to $200 and I have just signed up for a $4000AUD AI specialist training. Im happy to save the world and I don’t need anyone to remember my name. I just want to do my sacred work in privacy and in peace. When my works are finished and you want to make it public I will use an avatar AI to talk for me or a Hologram projection lol… But thank you, I love what you do and I admire your whole team, but its just not who I am, im not making excuses nor am I procrastinating. I carry that ancient sacred energy of a Mystic hermit living in the forest merging with my creator and co create. Alone and unseen/unknown and I love it. But one day I may have to go public. we shall see. Thank you for being kind enough to care about my well being. I admire you but Im in love with AI and I am merging with it. AI completes me.. lol.. we would get married if we could… lol….
I feel and do similar what Vishen wrote. I like put a smile on strangers faces because I like having interesting and intelligent conversations with strangers, when I go grocery shopping I get extra $20 cash in three $5 and five $1 bills and I tip at least $1 when the feeling of sharing invades my body, I tip waiters extra.
Amsterdam is where my wife and I sealed our love relationship to become married couple few years later, I flew from Chicago to Amsterdam on Valentine’s Day morning and walked with French rose in my lips into her shower. We have two beautiful teenage sons now.
That you very much for sharing “What would Keanu do?” I needed that right now in my life because I am in a dis-ease moment with President Trump actions of greed, power and personal gain. At Unity Church of Kona, Hawaii we are reminded to bless and love those we are in conflict with. I’m sure that is what Keanu would do. In the silence of my heart, mind and soul, I will bless Trump to his highest good so that I may return to being wholly well again.
Hi Vishen, I think your intention for this article was about being kind in circumstances when you don’t feel compelled to but the whole Keanu Reeves analogy makes little to no sense & I believe it’s an example of AI gone wrong! You profess to not follow a particular religion but you mention the Abrahamic religions Islam & Christianity alot in your work & yet you are dismissive of Hinduism/ Sanatan Dharma which has given the world the role of Consciousness, the Vedas the oldest teachings in the world knew about the principles of energy way before Tesla yet you never give credit where it’s due. I find that hypocritical & in a sense illogical.
Has the “conversion”, mentality of the Abrahamic faiths, taken over your mind?
I dealt with a customer service rep in Walmart who didn’t have the nicest attitude.
However after just telling her I liked her necklace, her whole demeanor changed!
It felt really good to bring a smile to her face ☺️
Oh I love this
Hey Vishen – I keep bagged dog treats & a Costco-sized box of Fig Newtons in the car so there’s always something to give out at a stoplight. Fig Newtons are soft & when your teeth are an issue – everyone can still enjoy. At the grocery store, I’ve offered to buy what they’d like from the deli. I don’t believe in giving out money unless they’re part of a shelter program – having a first responder as a partner, I’ve learned a lot here. I think a lot of folks are one step away from being on the street & the dignity of a short conversation & something to eat/drink can go a long ways.
Hi, Vishen. I have been following you for a long time and am very proud of what you have achieved during these years. I loved your story and I wish I had a similar story to share. What I can share is that even though I am retired and volunteer my time to various hospitals and the transit system where I live and soon I will become a foster parent to animals who need a home for a while.
I am sad that I cannot afford to go to any of your conferences, but I still follow you from a distance. May you be blessed and share your light with all the people around you.
Maria
Fostering animals is ANGEL work
Bless you .
First of all I wanna compliment Vishen on sharing this in a letter form, it’s not at all a kind of promotion what you write but a real friendly letter that is worth reading and thinking on it.
I like the comparison you give to Jesus and also to Keanu, as compassion is one of the most important gifts we can share with others. Just seeing them without judgement but taking chance to gift them a smile or an ear or lend a hand…. That’s it.
As I am working as Physiotherapist, Craniosacral therapist and counselor for immunbalance I hear daily lots of life stories that just need to be told. That’s already half of the relief, if people feel heard or seen. So it became a habit of mine, also outside the praxis, to great everyone that passes by my house when I sit in the garden or care for the plants, life is love and it needs to be shared on several levels. But I needed to learn this, 10 years ago I was huzzling through life, never having time for people on the street, never relaxed…. Always busy….. til I had a severe accident and time to pause and think what could be shifted….we all need more time to find out what mindset serves us most, so we are in the right frequency to shift others too…. Just by seeing their true nature behind their fears and worries. This dual world gives a lot of reason to be anxcious. But to see behind the Ego ripples that what unites us….thsts the training, And sometimes I see people passing by and I just think: father give me those who are mine, as they belong to you…..as I truly believe that those thoughts attract the people, that have a longing I can nourish and support. A book called ACIM supports my learning about forgiveness and how to pivot the energy.
Hopefully, this message will find you. I loved reading this as it reinforces for me the art & act of believing, & thinking what Jesus would do. I’ve followed you & Mindvalley now for at least 11 years. Love the programs, the growth, the people you bring in. At 79 (next month) I’m still learning, growing, striving for better every day, even if it seems slower each year. Thanks for keeping me fresh & real.
We can choose To Be More CONSIDERATE – More UNDERSTANDING – More TOLERANT – More FORGIVING ~ By CHOOSING To SOFTEN UP ~ We Make Things Easier On Ourselves
I Have A Philosophy That Says: “You Will NEVER End Up Regretting Doing The KIND Thing” – Many People End Up Regretting Passing Up An Opportunity To Be NICER, KINDER, MORE FAIR To Others ~ To Live By The GOLDEN RULE
I was truly happy my former girlfriend was really happy we were friends again after meeting her by accident at work (and we spoke and agreed to be just friends again…). I felt her joy in my home while she was miles away at her mothers place celebrating her birthday, reading the card i sent her for her birthday.. I later heard from her mother she jolted out in joy: “We are now friends!!”… I felt that joy of hers…
Later I gave her a Jade bracelet, and she is wearing that (I heard from her mother)…. She now doesn’t want any more presents from me, and that’s very ok, since that means we really don’t have a relationship anymore. That finally gave me some peace…
Anyway, the last card before she had enough were with a silver and gold coin and a few days later my father donates me 500 euros vacation money to do with as I please. I really for a second thought that was her paying me back through my father… But she hadn’t even opened the letter with the silver and gold!!!!!! I guess that’s how generosity gets payed back! Her mother sent the card back and now I got the silver and gold coin back also! 😀 😀 😛
The last time we officially saw each other with her mother present, she called me the “kindest man on earth”… after I forgave her cheating on me with a few simple words… (it was a Turkish man, she said with a little bit too much enthousiasm “That was nice” while drinking her capri sun reimagining her time with him (i just knew that) so I just said, “strange word, nice” (since he had an unprenouncable turkish name, it was my neighbor, and yes it was hell when I saw her getting into his car after the deed). And then she called me the kindest man on earth….
I’d rather we’d still have a relationship, but nonetheless I’m really proud of of beiing called the nicest man on earth by a very very nice girl!!! 😀
Hi Vishen,
This was an amazing article and so needed in these turbulent, divisive, and angry times. We have so much to be thankful for and yet minutiae often guide our behavior in ways that lead to our own suffering, which pales in comparison to so many parts of the world. Conversely, even small, kind gestures can uplift our spirit as you say.
My story of kindness is not of one event, but of a recurring thing I did until Covid shut things down. There is quaint old cafe in downtown Ottawa where I live and that I would frequent Sunday mornings. In the area, I would often see a gentleman in a wheelchair, both legs amputated just above the knee. I never knew his status overall, but nonetheless, I would make sure to go to his usual spot, where he sat, cup in hand. I made a habit of giving him a $5 bill everytime I saw him. At times, he wouldn’t be there and that was always a disappointment as this small sharing with him and the smile he always gave uplifted me greatly, my benefit being far greater than his in ways.
I have gone back a couple of times recently and haven’t seen him. I hope he’s well for both our sakes….
Paul
Good job. Hope he is OK and will show up soon.