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Why Am I So Emotional? How To Master Your Emotional Responses

by Mindvalley April 17, 2019

We’ve all had those days when we just can’t keep a lid on our emotions. The smallest inconvenience will turn us red with rage. A sad memory will bring us to tears.

This can happen to anyone, but this type of emotional reactivity impacts some more frequently than others.

Those people will likely wonder: “Why am I so emotional?”

If you’ve ever found yourself feeling as if you’re at the mercy of your emotional responses, this article is for you. We’ll take a look at what factors into emotional reactivity and what you can do about it. 

What Does It Mean When You Cry For No Reason?


You may have experienced this yourself or seen it in someone close to you. One minute, everything’s fine. But a second later, the tears are flowing.

There are several possible medical explanations for this. Depression and anxiety may be the root cause.

Or, there is a medical condition called the pseudobulbar affect which occurs when the areas of the brain which control emotions suffer an injury or disturbance.

What does feeling emotional mean?

If we take the aforementioned medical conditions out of the equation, feeling emotional is often connected to self-regulation. We can think of self-regulation as a filter for our emotions, thoughts, and actions.

Without it, our emotions can easily overpower us. We tear up without cause, anger turns to fury, and we’re constantly at the mercy of our feelings.

In other words, to be emotional is to frequently find yourself in situations where you’re not in control of your emotions.

Being emotional isn’t a medical condition you need to cure, but it can have a negative impact on your life. For that reason, it’s something we should work on. And fortunately, we can.

how to control emotions

How Can I Stop Being So Emotional?


There are numerous techniques you can use to reduce how emotional you are.

For example, you can try “attention regulation.” When you notice you’re getting emotional, you switch your attention instead to a problem you can solve. The shift in focus can reduce the intensity of your emotions.

Meditation is excellent in this regard as well. Or you can try exercising – you’ll feel better in all regards, emotions included.

Besides these techniques, here are two ways to further reduce your emotional reactivity:

1. Developing emotional insight

To develop more emotional insight, what you want to do is pay attention to, acknowledge, and accept your emotions.

-Jon Butcher, Author of Mindvalley’s Lifebook Quest

Nobody likes to feel burdened with anger or sadness. However, these emotions are here to tell us something, and it’s important to listen.

You don’t necessarily want to linger on them, but you also don’t want to ignore them.

Essentially, do your best to learn from your negative emotions. These insights are crucial to helping you reduce the intensity of your emotions.

2. Improving emotional control

With emotional control, what you’re trying to do is create the emotions that you would most like to feel on an ongoing basis.

-Jon Butcher, Author of Mindvalley’s Lifebook Quest

To be emotional is to experience emotions to the extreme. Typically, these are negative emotions. And in order to avoid such extremes, you need to counteract those negative emotions with positive ones.

Think of it this way:

You’re having a great time at a party, and someone spills a drink on you. If you choose to just laugh it off and continue enjoying yourself, you’ve allowed a good emotion to control a bad one.

Pick a positive emotion and create a list of activities that help you feel this emotion. Engage in the activities on the list as often as you can. You’ll condition your mind to reach for positive emotions over negative ones in other circumstances.

The final takeaway

To be overly emotional is to lose control of your emotions and let them take you where you don’t want to go.

Instead, strive to master them and stay in charge of your life.


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Have you ever felt so emotional that you weren’t in control of yourself? Share your experiences and how you overcame this in the comments.

by Mindvalley
Mindvalley is creating a global school that delivers transformational education for all ages. Powered by community. Fueled by fun. We are dedicated to ensuring that humans live happier, healthier, and more fulfilled lives by plugging in the gaps that conventional education failed to teach us. We do this by organising real-world events around the world and producing world-class quality programmes in several areas of transformation, including mind, body, and performance.

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