Your body image is all about how you perceive your own body. A negative body image is when you think about yourself in a negative way – feeling uncomfortable and unsatisfied with your physical appearance, which, in essence, has an adverse affect on your overall wellbeing.
How Did Your Negative Body Image Start?
To maintain a healthy balanced life and happiness, you need to figure out why you have this negative perception about yourself in the first place.
- Was it during puberty, when your body was going through a lot of natural changes, that you developed a negative body image?
- Was it by mass-media, which has constructed an image of ‘attractiveness’ in your mind and has consequently been firmly shaping your way of thinking with constant imagery?
- Was it unwarranted and negative comments from teachers, friends, and family that made you compare yourself to others and found yourself lacking?
- Was it your boyfriend or girlfriend pressuring you to look the way they think is the right look for you?
Think deeply about the root-causes (specific to your own circumstance), and write them down.
How Bad Is Your Negative Body Image, Really?
I you have a distorted, negative body image, a normal, healthy weight can be perceived as overweight. For example, an anorexic young woman may see a reflection greater than her actual size in a mirror.
Or, some obese individuals have reported that they did not realize they were as large – thinking that they were much smaller – until they saw themselves in a video, window reflection (some refuse to look in a mirror ever), or photo. Or, you’re convinced that only other people are attractive and your body size or shape is totally out ot whack. Or, you simply feel awkward, ashamed, self-conscious, and anxious about the way you look, and you keep making excuses when you have to expose your body, like going for a swim or during sex.
Think about this and determine how bad your perception about your body image is, and what the true reasons are for you feeling this way.
Now, make a list of the things you think you can do to start a new mental conversation with yourself about this, and how you can change it. Don’t Google it, think about it in a personal, clear way.
The Difference Between Beauty And Attractiveness
Attractiveness is not about beauty. There is big difference between beauty and attractiveness. Perfect physical features may be viewed as beautiful; but, those who have them, don’t necessarily experience themselves as beautiful.
Attractiveness is about being pleasing (or appealing) to the senses; harboring qualities, or features, that arouse interest. Attractiveness has the power to attract, to be appealing, captivating, charismatic, charming, and engaging. Confidence, for example, is attractive. Being warm-spirited or energetic are also attractive qualities.
“Beauty” is a rigid, static, physical image; one that can be Photoshopped or surgically obtained. Attractiveness is a fluid, a variable psychological experience, one that develops and evolves over time.
You can be attractive to others, or simply feel this way about yourself. It’s an attainable goal for those who take care of their bodies, enjoy their lives, maintain sensuality, and engage with others.
10 Ways To Feel More Attractive
- Personal care: Keep yourself clean and well-groomed. Look after your skin. You will start to glow and others will notice. Buy something nice to wear that will make you look better. Something that will make you appear more confident.
- Wear something sexy: Ever notice that when you are wearing something sexy it changes your whole energy? So wear something that makes you feel your best.
- Treat yourself: Give yourself doses of lavish luxury, and permission to let go of any guilt and simply indulge in something that reawakens your sensual energy. This can be a massage or a hot date with yourself.
- Develop an authentic smile: You will feel better and others will respond to you in a positive way.
- Broaden your sense of humour: Humour is attractive
- Develop a strong presence: resolve, determination, and spirit are sexy
- Build confidence: Confidence comes from knowledge and being congruent in your own beliefs. So keep learning, and always tell the truth in life, business, and relationships about who you are.
- Listen to the Music: Music taps into your most authentic, deeply emotional place. Listen to the music that always make you feel good about life.
- Accentuate the positive: Choose clothes that accentuate your assets. Read positive books. Be around positive people. Be positive about the present and the future.
- Self-love and respect: The external pursuit of needing to change your body can often damage you spirituality by isolating yourself from the internal-self: the spirit, the soul, and the whole authentic self. Take this back and focus on spirit rather than body.
A great place to start, when it comes to building up your self-love and confidence and thus, becoming more attractive, is to praise yourself. Here is a wonderful talk by the glorious Marisa Peer on doing just that:
- 3 Ways to Get a Positive Body Image Right Now
- This Is Why Self-Respect Is Crucial for Happiness
- 5 Ways to Triumph Over Body Image and the Media
What traits do you find to be the most attractive? Intelligence, confidence, radiating love? Please share with us in the comment section below!